Author Archives: Denise

About Denise

Born in Hackensack, NJ. Moved to South Florida in 1968. Have lived in Central Florida since 1990. I am a Published Author (Backstreet Mom), Certified Life Coach, Clinical Hypnotherapist and studying to become a Certified Recovery Support Specialist. On the Board of The N.O.W. Matters More Foundation since its inception in 2011.

Get Your Signed Copy of my Book NOW! New Price!!$$

Hello everyone!!!

Just wanted to let you know that I have repriced my book so that everyone should be able to buy it!!  Unfortunately I can only do this deal in the United States due to postal rates.  But if you have not gotten your copy yet do so now before they are all gone.

On another note, these are trying times we are living in at the moment.  My hope is that we can all move past our differences and come together as a people.  Love conquers all they say and I truly believe it.  Hatred has never gained any good outcomes.  If we unite as humans instead of letting our fears get the best of us we can overcome the worst darkness.  As Americans we have endured much since our birth and there will be more hurdles in our future.  But without unity there can be no hope of survival.  All of these chapters will play out as they are supposed to, but to be left standing is what we have always accomplished.  Try to let compassion rule.  Do not let hate prevail.  Peace be with you all.

#PRAYFORORLANDO

In light of recent tragic events in our beloved Orlando I will take the time to pray for those souls that were lost or injured. I would also like to express my condolences to the families of the victims. Please remember that your loved one is never truly gone, they will always reside in your heart.

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What is your ENTITLEMENT SCORE?

Some people call our youth “the entitlement generation”.  I believe that is true in some cases, however, I also believe that we are all entitled to a few things.  Without them our lives can seem meaningless and without direction.  I have created this quiz for you to figure out how you treat yourself.  In other words, do you love yourself enough to actually allow yourself some entitlements or do you just go without and have a huge hole in your heart?

Answer these questions honestly and judge for yourself if you need to work on some issues in your life or are you a truly harmonious human being in touch with your feelings and happy with your life.  I hope you are happy, but if not I have methods to help you.  Just email me at denise@wellbrietycoaching.com and let’s talk…

Take the quiz and find out:

  1.  How many hours per week do you spend pampering yourself?  <5 >5 >10
  2. What emotion do you feel when you look in the mirror? Love, Hate, Other
  3. Do you willingly accept compliments from others? Yes or No
  4. Are you currently in a loving and respectful relationship? Yes or No
  5. What mood do you usually wake up in? Happy, Sad, Depressed, Other
  6. How many hours per week do you spend on social media? <5 >5 >10
  7. Do you feel deserving of love, respect and happiness? Yes or No
  8. How many true friends do you have? <5 >5 None
  9. How many hours a week do you spend with friends? <5 >5 >10
  10. Do you consider yourself a happy, fulfilled person? Yes or No

The Mother & Son Relationship in Addiction

The relationship between a Mother and her son is one that transcends time.  No matter the age of your child they are still your baby and you want to protect them.  I remember speaking to a therapist (and close friend) years ago regarding my son.  I will never forget this conversation as long as I live.  She was actually out on the road touring with us at my son’s request.  He was on a rampage of using and drinking night after night.  She did her best to try and use every tool she possessed to help him understand how bad his addiction had become.  He would not listen.  I was in a total bubble of denial about his addiction and refused to see it.  This was not helpful to either of us.

After one particularly bad night I sat down with her and asked openly, “Is my son an addict?”.  She answered “YES”.  My heart instantly fell into a bottomless pit of pain.  I began to sob and asked her for help.  A few days later my son was flown to rehab, he was safe.

Safety and happiness are all a parent really wants for their child.  I was no different.  However, my lack of knowledge about this insidious disease caused me to become on of my son’s greatest enablers.  I submerged myself in every book, article and conversation that had to do with addiction and recovery.  I needed to know what my child was going through and how best I could help us both.  This was the key and first step to my own healing.

I know that a Mother’s first instinct is to protect her child at all cost, but in this case that is not the best way to help them.  They need to learn to deal with their demons and heal in their own time and space.  A lot of people talk about tough love, but I am not a believer in that path.  No matter how bad things became, I never gave up or turned my son away.  I was there for him whenever he asked for help.  We all have our own roads to follow in this life.  Choose yours wisely and with compassion and understanding.  If you think you child is using, seek guidance from a professional or a group.  Al-Anon is a good place to begin.  There are also a lot of websites to turn to with meetings and articles of help.  I was told by one of my son’s therapists in rehab these words of wisdom: “You cannot help your child unless you put your healing first.”  I have found them to be true.

Just remember, you were there when they fell down the first time, so be there to help lift them up each time they ask.  You will love yourself for it.

Addiction and Relationships

Hello again!  I hope these blogs are helping you to understand more about the DISEASE of ADDICTION.  It took me years of study to truly understand it, so I empathize with those of you who have loved ones suffering with their demons.  How you as a spouse, Mother, Father, sibling handle your relationship with an addict impacts them tremendously.  They may not care to show that while they are using, but your support through that time will definitely be rewarded once they are in recovery.  I know this from first hand experience with my own son.

Trust is probably the most touchy issue within this addiction dynamic.  You have probably lost all faith in the addict because of his or her lies and manipulations.  If your loved one is truly in recovery and working their 12 steps, then this would be the time to sit down and talk to them about exactly what they are doing to maintain their sobriety.  Yes, people, ASK QUESTIONS!!!  Communication is the key to success here as with any relationship.  They should now be ready to quietly and calmly talk to you about their reasons for using and how you may have impacted them during that time.

When you have this talk please BE PREPARED.  Before you sit down simply write a list of the questions.  Be patient with them as they answer and do not judge them for any criticism they may toss at you.  This should be a time of honest, open discussion, not bashing.

Finally, I would advise to be as loving and supportive of them now in their recovery as you can possibly be.  We tend to walk on eggshells while they are using as well as when they are sober.  Not necessary if you can talk frankly about how both of you truly feel, NOW.

Feel free to email me with any questions you may have about this topic at denise@wellbrietycoaching.com

Until next time… Be Blessed

What is a Recovery Coach?

Since becoming certified as a RECOVERY SUPPORT SPECIALIST I have included this into my practice for 2015. But a lot of people really don’t understand what a Recovery Coach does. So here is how I see it. Once a recovering addict has immersed his or herself into their new healthy lifestyle, these items should be in place: Schedule of AA, NA meetings, a Sponsor, scheduled therapy or group sessions. Any or all of these are crucial in sobriety maintenance. But what about the day to day items that come into play? Those things that do not revolve around the twelve steps or your emotional stability?  AHA! That is where I come in. Those daily challenges that you forgot about when using, such as: bill paying, budgets, writing a resume’ or even something as simple as scheduling the right amount of “ME” time. For a recovering addict the stresses of daily functions can be as overwhelming as any other major life issues. As a Recovery Coach we talk on a weekly basis about such items and work through how to get back and keep the order in your life that you have strived so hard to achieve. I will be another invaluable cog in your toolbox of recovery. I have dealt with addiction on many levels over the past 9 years, and have helped many clients throughout the world cope with a long list of life issues.  Let me help you stay on your path of sobriety and live the healthy, happy life you deserve!  Contact me today for your free online session: denise@wellbrietycoaching.com

THE HUNT IS ON!!!!

scavhuntpstrcolorGet ready for an EPIC EVENT in OCTOBER!!  The N.O.W. Matters More Foundation is sponsoring their first international social media based SCAVENGER HUNT!!  It’s simple, just download Instagram and then go to www.onedaynow.org to register you and your team.  On October 11th at 12noon EST we will be sending out 24 tasks to be completed by 12 noon Sunday, October 12th.  Everytime you complete a task you take a picture and upload it using #onedaynow.  Each picture of a completed task is worth one entry.

This will be fun for the whole family.  Our goal is 100,000 entries so please tell your family and friends and lets get REGISTERED!!!!!!!

This event is to promote awareness worldwide about our foundation and substance abuse issues.  This disease affects millions of families everyday.  There are over 20 million people in recovery in the United States right now.  You can commit to one day of sobriety, do it NOW!

Go to www.onedaynow.org to register and see rules.  

For more information about our foundation go to www.nowmattersmore.org.

 

Welcome All!!!

Hello and Welcome to Wellbriety Coaching.  This name has no affiliation with the treatment model used for indigenous people.  I chose this name because it encompasses the meaning of who I can help.  Those who need Life Coaching and/or those who need Recovery Coaching.  As you will see on the About Denise page, I have dealt with people in recovery for many years and wish to add more to my client base.  So if you are seeking guidance for everything from day to day challenges of a single Mom or College Student all the way to maintaining your sobriety with a little acceptability nudge from me, it’s all here.  I can help and I want to take you under my wing.

As I continue to modify my website I will add testimonials from those I have assisted in the past.  Please email me today for more information.

denise@wellbrietycoaching.com